The April Fair of Vanities

"Something is happening outside.

Oliver Thansan
Oliver Thansan
19 April 2024 Friday 10:36
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The April Fair of Vanities

"Something is happening outside... the skies over Baghdad have been lit up," said CNN anchor Bernie Shaw. It was one of the historic moments of television and, why not, of journalism, when only one network broadcast the bombings of the first night of the Gulf War for the entire world. Nowadays this has long been overcome, because anyone with a cell phone can set up their own live show, but the images of Iran's recent attack with drones and missiles repelled in the sky by Israel have reminded us of those distant 90s of the last century.

Another memory of the past is the underground shelters that Americans built at home for fear of an atomic cucumber from the Soviets falling on them when the Cold War was hotter than ever. Nowadays what is used are Iron Dome shields, like the Israeli one, which made it possible to intercept 99% of the 170 drones, 30 cruise missiles and 120 ballistic missiles launched by Iran from its territory and that of its affiliated groups. in neighboring countries, such as Syria, Yemen, Iraq and Lebanon. Either the Iranians are very bad at shooting or the Israelis are very good at defending themselves. Or perhaps, as evil tongues say, everything was so rigged that they signed a draw rather than unleash a real war.

In any case, we must celebrate that this new type of dewar can be implemented, that is, waging war without causing deaths. Speaking of which, Putin could apply it in Ukraine and Israel could also apply it in Gaza. It would be something like celebrating a wedding without getting married, now that this week we had the Barcelona Bridal Fashion Week. Given so much militaristic desire among Earthlings, it would not be a bad idea to give free rein to human vanity without causing fatalities (or injuries). Weapons manufacturers could continue with their business and no one would need to die. "Hey, tomorrow I'm going to fire a missile at you at 12:03 p.m. in the Golan Heights," an Iranian says to an Israeli. "Okay, we program the shield," they respond, "and we also warn the Yankees, so they don't get angry."

After the attack on Israel, Iran staged a military parade to show the world that it is a regional military power. And their missiles failed more than a fairground shotgun. Furthermore, the regime has become so emboldened that it has taken advantage of its war adventure to reinforce veil controls on women. The vanity of men has no limits. What would they think if they forced each and every one of them to shave their beards? What would they do with their faces open, without those furry masks?

One of the great definitions of the word "vanity" refers to this concept: "Expiration of the things of this world." But is human behavior really finite or rather cyclical and repetitive? Today in Iran, authentic "bonfires of the vanities" are set up at the expense mainly of the rights and freedoms of women, as when in the 15th century objects condemned by the ecclesiastical authorities as sinful were burned. Removing the veil is more dangerous for an Iranian woman than any drone controlled by international politics.

The arrogance of the vain has no limits. His words and actions are vain, that is, useless and insubstantial, almost the expression of a fantasy. Only in this way can we understand that both the United States and our European Union want us to believe that they are going to impose economic sanctions on Iran for its attack on Israel and that this is going to piss off the Iranians. Well, you know what? Well, after the experience of Russia, this no longer works. And, according to forecasts, Putin's country will grow three times as much this year as the European countries that sanction it. They really want to deceive us and, unfortunately, we allow ourselves to be deceived. And to make matters worse, the IMF warns us that the war in the Middle East can raise inflation, once it seemed more or less controlled and which was caused by the armed conflict in Ukraine. Vanity has no limits. There is no such thing as "the perishability of the things of this world."

One who has no problems showing his vanity in public is our president Pedro Sánchez, who continues with his particular process to have the Palestinian State internationally recognized and, incidentally, to be given the Nobel Peace Prize. Like the Catalan independentists at the time, the socialist leader went this week to collect Slovenia's support for his Palestinian cause. "It is time to move from words to action," he said. Even the Government is already thinking about appointing an ambassador and analyzing the modalities to express support for the Palestinian State, with the precedent of South Sudan in 2011. It is the expression of the April Fair of vanities.

All of this is increasingly reminiscent of when the supporters of the Procés presented their reports and speculations in which they imagined what the new Catalan Republic would be like and when, how and by whom it would be recognized first. That's what it's like to live in this country where "vanity fairs" abound, like the one described by the English author William Makepeace Thackeray in his novel. Imagine a country called Vanity and you will discover that the entire planet Earth should be called that.