Since this week I am aware that no matter how hard I try, this will be an unfinished work. It is the fifth installment and I see the end further and further away. There are so many things to explain, justify and tell the world, from the prism of post-baroque Valencia, without subtleties or ambiguities. And who better than a bald guy to do it bareback? The Valencian ecosystem is not over, as Visente would say.
BARREJAT: Typical Valencian drink made from a mixture of dry anise and mistela. The proportions vary according to the consumer's taste, but the most common is half and half. It is a suggestive alcoholic mix and a tremendously popular drink among the working and party classes. The barrejat hangover is not easily forgotten.
BLACK AND WHITE: Sig.1: One of the Valencian sandwiches par excellence, it consists of a sausage and a blood sausage, always with something else: broad beans, fried tomato, all i oli, tortilla, young garlic...etc. Sig. 2: Mixed ice cream served in a glass, where a scoop of meringue milk is added to the granulated coffee.
CAMPS, PACO: Former president of the Valencian Generalitat who ended up hanging out in the Albufera and calling strange press conferences in hotels. He is seen in the front row at the most solemn religious celebrations, asserting his status as honorable ex molt. Man of strong convictions, author of the phrase: "I have not left one and I am already in another."
KOLA-COCA: Invention of a distillery in Aielo de Malferit. In 1953, a famous multinational company based in Atlanta (USA) paid about 30,000 pesetas for the patent. Its original name was "Coca Kola Nut", and it is a syrup with a complex formulation, with or without alcohol, to which by adding carbonated water you obtain a vital and sparkling refreshment.
DISABILITY: Restless state of mind caused by an unknown and transitory worry, which prevents those who suffer from it from doing anything other than being "disabled."
MISSING: When a person dies in Valencia, this verbal form is used to express pain due to the absence of a loved or respected being. "So-and-so is missing" It implies, whoever the deceased is, that he is missed. It is an old term on the verge of disappearing.
FARTONS: Invention of the Polo family, originally from Titaguas. It consists of a long and spongy brioche that sucks the horchata in a no res.
GARROFÓ: (Phaseolus lunatus) Lima bean, manaba bean, broad bean or pallar. It is an annual herbaceous species of the legume family. It is cultivated in many warm and temperate countries. It is considered one of the authentic and essential ingredients of Valencian paella. Being a product that came from the new world like the tomato, it shakes the theory that Jaume I invented the Valencian paella. The terms “garrofón” or “garrafón” that they say in Madrid, I suppose they refer to the carafe drink, which does not agree with them at all.
JAUME I: James I the Conqueror, was king of Aragon, Valencia and Mallorca, count of Barcelona, count of Urgell, lord of Montpellier and other fiefdoms in Occitania. He was born in Montpellier in 1208, and died in Alzira in 1276. Many Valencians attribute countless inventions to him such as horchata, mocadorà, paella, tro de bac i l'all i oli. He never wore a dragon on his helmet, that is part of the mythology of the Palau de la Generalitat, like the Zaplana jacuzzi.
MONIATO: The greatest insult or humiliation that a Valencian can give or receive. However, it is not classified as insult in the penal code, despite attacking the dignity and prestige of the individual in a devastating way.
XIMO-BAYO: Musical phenomenon of the 90s. Disc-jockey with sunglasses, overalls, cap and fog lights. His image and his songs have been used in high-impact advertising campaigns: Atún Calvo, Bodegas Arráez, Arroz La Fallera... Curiously, he has never worked for the pharmaceutical industry.
(Will continue)
