Talking to your children is not always an easy task. Especially when they enter their teenage years, a stage in which it is more difficult for them to open up to their parents and share their personal confidences with them. Therefore, it is frustrating for parents to perceive that their children are going through some problem that they are not told about.
It could be a problem of bullying, an argument with a friend, lack of self-esteem and insecurities, doubts about your feelings or sexuality, anxiety, feelings of sadness or fear, difficulties with studies... Whatever the case, the ideal It is being able to establish a close relationship with your children, in which they feel that they can trust their parents and turn to them when they need help and support.
Forcing them to tell you what's happening to them tactlessly can lead to an argument, or even less trust on the part of your children, who will feel uncomfortable if you don't approach the situation delicately. In this sense, the neuropsychologist Álvaro Bilbao, who is also the father of three children, has shared on his profile on the social network Instagram (where he has 1.9 million followers) three psychology strategies that he uses to help children tell him your problems.
First of all, he advises giving them freedom. Say a comforting phrase that shows your empathy and understanding, such as “I notice something is happening to you and I would like to help you, but I understand that you need time.” “Few things help a child open up as much as feeling that his parents give him space and trust him,” explains the expert.
On the other hand, he recommends telling him how you felt in a similar situation if you suspect where his problems come from. “It is always easier to talk to a person who has gone through similar problems than with a parent who may judge us or seem to know all the answers,” she adds.
Another recommendation is to go for a walk together, because "it is much easier for a child to talk about what happens to him when he walks side by side, he feels relaxed and accompanied, than when he is face to face with an adult in a room." closed".
In his video, the neuropsychologist points out that the most effective thing is to combine these three techniques. Furthermore, in the description that accompanies the publication he adds an extra tip, which consists of doing an activity together such as cooking, drawing or assembling a Lego set. “Anything that keeps his hands busy allows you to sit side by side and connect will help him a lot to open up to you,” concludes Dr. Bilbao.
