To err is human. Whether to a greater or lesser extent and with more or less seriousness, no one is free to make a mistake. And, when that situation arrives, one of the moments of greatest emotional vulnerability that can be faced in human relationships takes place: asking for forgiveness. It is not something simple, although it may seem so, because in many cases the request for leniency has many implications, such as dealing with the consequences of what has been done wrong. Also, not all apologies are sincere. So how do you know if they are a sincere apology?
Social pressure or the simple intention of wanting to settle a negative situation with another person as soon as possible can lead to asking for forgiveness with a false feeling. In fact, this is a very common thing. Apologies are requested without behind there being any conviction or contrition. If we have doubts about the sincerity of that forgiveness, knowing if they are trying to deceive us or not is simpler than we might think. It is enough to identify three key points.
The debate about whether or not everything should be forgiven is complex enough to be treated separately. Regardless of the answer, the first thing to consider is whether this is a genuine apology or just a muddle-head. To find out, it must be analyzed whether said forgiveness meets three basic requirements.
The first of these is that there really is repentance for the failure that has been committed. When it is a true apology, it is usually noticed in the way in which that person expresses himself, since there is a greater personal involvement and not just typical phrases that are usually used in a generic way.
On the other hand, the recognition of responsibility will be one of the elementary points and it is precisely in this that more mistakes are made. Dropping one excuse after another or trying to shift that responsibility onto someone else are clear indications that it is not true forgiveness. After all, in this way you are trying to avoid that debt that has been acquired. A sincere forgiveness is not accompanied by buts.
Third, the willingness to repair the damage done. There are times when it is impossible to reverse a situation, but it is possible to act in some way to compensate, as far as possible, for the mistake made. This would be the consummation of a sincere apology, which starts with a repentance, which implies the fact of being aware of the suffering caused; continues with the admission of guilt, an act of courage and honesty; and ends with a feeling of responsibility that leads to an active attitude to remedy it in any way possible.
