You have rarity written on your forehead.
I was born strange and they always reminded me: “How strange you are!”, until they managed to convince me.
It's written down, literally.
Now I live in touch with my weirdness and I allow it, because I know that most of my emotions and thoughts are automatic and I don't punish myself. When I was young, the same week I went to sign up for the seminary to be a priest, I tried out as a porn actor.
It's strange, yes.
I am coherent because I allow myself my contradictions. I was just getting to know myself. Being weird is being yourself, but it can also be a feeling of failure, of incorrectness, of inferiority, loneliness, guilt; of not deserving. We have all felt this way at some point.
Inadequate.
But when we allow it, rarity is fresh air. When the black sheep makes peace with its weirdness it leads the flock. That's the beauty of weirdness, living our quirkiness without guilt.
“Cultivate your flaws; “It will be what your enemies envy the most,” said Wilde.
Rarity is beautiful when instead of repressing it, one lives it without guilt, as something natural, automatic, not chosen. And he understands that precisely this rarity is his contribution to the group to enrich it.
Today there are a lot of weirdos, narcissists who like to be looked at.
Trying to get attention is vulgar. What is important are personality traits. If you are intelligent, sensitive and capable of sustaining loneliness, you are a rare one for sure.
Because?
Because the norm is made for those who do not think, for those who copy. Replicants repeat psychosocial patterns and behaviors automatically. They are conformist, traditional, logical people.
Easier than being weird?
Being weird fills you with a feeling of guilt. They civilize us: now don't do this, now do this, and you end up being what you're supposed to be and not what you are. To fit in is to mutilate.
We are an accumulation of circumstances.
No one decides your temperament, inclinations, tastes and preferences. Everything was generated from the unconscious part, which we could not mold to our whim.
Is it too much pressure to be the best version of yourself?
It is the psychological slogan of the American dream that ends in a nightmare, in self-observation, paranoia, it is the culture of absolute control, if you control yourself all the time you are not flowing, you live a character.
It seems demanding.
Stressful, it creates anxiety and emptiness, but it is the goose that lays the golden eggs of self-help and coaching to squeeze us out and sell us more courses and workshops. The best version is the one that best adapts to each circumstance.
Who dictates the rule?
Religion and psychologists, who now have incredible power, like priests before; what official science, fashions, social networks, politics and the obedient masses dictate. Question little, follow a lot, be constant, seem happy..., that's what's important.
And what does it mean to be different in a society that normalizes everything?
Being and doing from yourself, with humility but without trying to be liked, leaving yourself alone with who you are, which is not easy, most people continually pretend roles.
And does that harm us?
Either you cling to your originality or you go straight to emotional disorder without knowing who you are because you have copied ways of dressing, working, doing things. Being weird is an internal investigation, exposing yourself to life, risking it a little.
Tell me what your rarity is.
I am a child of cortisol, my mother had clinical depression and when I was 10 months old she committed suicide. They took me to my father and my stepmother, with whom she cheated on my mother, a typical relationship between a 20-year-old nurse and a 40-year-old doctor. Status, power and a new young woman.
A pathetic normality.
That childhood and a conservative and stale education took away my self-esteem and confidence in myself, from there the psychologist was born but the criminal or the drug addict could have been born.
Can we reinvent ourselves?
In business, but being is not made of plasticine, this is another idea of official psychology, which places us in the "everyone seems to manage to reinvent themselves except me." Again the advertising promise that turns into more helplessness, frustration and feelings of guilt.
But we can always improve.
Yes, but the illusion that everything depends on us, that each of us is our own isolated cause, the origin of everything that happens to us, is attractive and tempting but cruel.
So?
Accept, which is understanding that the beginning of most thoughts and emotions are automatic, unconscious, visceral, conditioned and biographical.
