The popular proverb says that “whoever loves you well will make you cry.” For years we have been spectators of stories that idealized toxic relationships in novels, movies and series. But it is important to be aware that love is not about suffering.
There are people who feel bad in their own relationship and cannot identify why. Many are not even aware that they are trapped in a toxic relationship and that the other person is not doing them any good. Of course, we must distinguish between feeling sad after an argument or specific disagreement, and that feeling of sadness and discomfort being a constant in the couple.
On the Sanarai psychology blog, they emphasize that we must identify the sensations that invade us when we are with our partner. This discomfort may indicate that the other person manipulates us, does not respect us, belittles us, humiliates us, mistreats us, yells at us, insults us or makes us feel insecure.
“Accepting that we are living in a relationship where emotional abuse prevails can be a difficult process, but it is a key step to seeking help and getting out of toxic situations,” the experts point out. And the thing is, if the person does not accept that they suffer some type of abuse in their relationship, "they will let many things happen that they should not," they warn from Sanarai.
Therefore, we must identify if our relationship makes us feel bad with situations such as negative comparisons, possessive behaviors, if the partner punishes you with silence, if they put their feelings, needs and opinions above yours, if they do not listen to you, do not It helps you with your self-esteem, constantly judges you or gaslights you (a type of emotional abuse that consists of manipulating the other person).
Sanarai experts emphasize that physical violence is not the only thing that can hurt a person in a relationship, but also psychological, economic, social or sexual violence. They highlight that some factors that may be affecting the relationship between the couple may be low self-esteem, poor communication, emotional dependence, lack of commitment, lack of emotional intelligence and empathy, lack of affection, limited social relationships or obsession with relationship.
From Sanarai they recommend that you review your self-esteem, your self-esteem and your self-confidence. Also set limits, demand respect, make your position clear and be firm with your expectations. Likewise, they insist on the importance of seeking help if necessary and communicating your feelings to your partner.
