How you treat money with your partner can make Valentine's Day sour... and the relationship

Today is Valentine's Day, a holiday for Gauls and Brits with increasing popularity among Spaniards, especially among young people.

Oliver Thansan
Oliver Thansan
13 February 2024 Tuesday 09:27
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How you treat money with your partner can make Valentine's Day sour... and the relationship

Today is Valentine's Day, a holiday for Gauls and Brits with increasing popularity among Spaniards, especially among young people. Although some say they do not celebrate it, the majority admit to being attentive, and thinking, at least, of some detail for their partner. Sometimes seen as materialistic, it is still an excuse to express and celebrate love and affection, even if sometimes that means breaking the bank.

Among couples, money and finances have always been a taboo topic. The dilemma of who pays on the first date is a debate that is still present in society, one of those tricky disputes that can begin with laughter and jokes, but end with anger... and for the moment there is no clear answer. .

A study carried out by ING last year shows that 55% of Spaniards prefer to discuss money issues with their partner rather than with their friends. Even so, many of those surveyed claim to be unaware of what their partner earns. The study also shows how shared expenses are managed, equally regardless of the difference in income.

Money could even cost the relationship, the report Why do Spanish couples get divorced? of the Spanish Association of Family Lawyers (AEAFA), speaks that finances, as well as economic difficulties, are the fourth reason for divorce in Spain. “They make true the saying that when money goes out the door, love jumps out the window,” said AEAFA member Álvaro Iraizoz.

The aforementioned study, De Dinero No Se Habla by ING, indicates that 39% of Spaniards believe they spend more as a couple than as a single person. Although the statistics change as we blow out the candles, those over 56 think the opposite. What all Spaniards are clear about is that with children, life becomes more expensive and when they leave, they not only save, but they perceive themselves to be in greater mental health.

Be that as it may, several financial experts agree that, like everything in life, communication is the key to success and above all the best way to avoid a breakup. “You have to make things clear at all times to avoid misunderstandings,” says Antonio Romo Baragaño of Consultoría Baragaño. “One of the main errors lies in not explicitly treating each specific case, assuming that one of the two will always pay this or that, or that one simply by charging more will pay more... These are some of the situations that arise. can give and that easily lead to arguments. We must try to avoid it,” concludes the financial consultant.

Hand in hand with good communication comes building a budget plan, another key. It will serve as a roadmap to avoid overspending on fixed payments such as household bills, outings, subscriptions to entertainment and music platforms... and allocating a certain amount to personal whims. Each one their own. “In most cases the couple is not aware of what they spend the money on. There is a financial disorder because one person spends more than the other, there are no budgets or one does not know how to manage the situation," says Elizabeth Wakefield, financial advisor and expert in personal finance. "It is also important to know how to maintain independence and have an estimated amount for one's own whims,” he concludes.

Talking about independence and your own whims leads you to mention the term financial infidelity, understood as spending or making purchases secretly from your partner. The situation worsens when the money is shared or belongs to the other person. Another behavior is masculinizing finances, when the man is the one who manages the couple's finances and decides their budgets and expenses. It is advisable, of course, to avoid both to enjoy shared financial health and enjoy the couple's economy.

Simple advice to keep in mind, on Valentine's Day or in everyday life, you should never spend more than you have and go into debt. It can result in a colossal mistake. "Another of the main mistakes is not knowing or not thinking that money costs money. Many people make the mistake of having free money on hand. Easily resorting to credit cards or loans is often a very bad decision. People goes into debt without knowing it," says Wakefield.

Many Spaniards are joining the trend of relying on a financial consultant for their daily operations. It may sound exaggerated, but it is not. A financial advisor who puts your accounts in order can be the perfect solution to the ravages of poor management, experts say. An alternative that reduces tension and removes this type of problems.

With data in hand, but above all with good communication and a budget plan, will you celebrate Valentine's Day without disappointment?