Managing our own emotions is a daily challenge for many people. Especially when it comes to negative emotions, such as frustration, anger or sadness. And precisely it is also difficult to know how we should react to other people's crises.
Knowing how to react when someone has a panic attack, when they are managing a period of mourning or going through depression, is not an easy task. Sometimes, even if we have the best intentions, we can make the situation worse, overwhelming the person more, putting pressure on them or making them feel worse.
When we meet someone who is suffering from an anxiety crisis, is angry, sad or scared, an impulse that comes out almost automatically is to tell the person to calm down. However, these words that we speak with the best of our intentions are often misguided.
Asking someone at a vulnerable moment to calm down can be a trigger to aggravate their discomfort. According to psychologist Javier Ares Arranz on his Instagram account (@notasdetupsicologo), when someone has a crisis saying “calm down” can be counterproductive and harmful.
This is because, as the psychologist indicates, these words can invalidate the person's emotions, make them feel misunderstood and aggravate their symptoms. What can we do instead?
