For Bojan Krkic (33), things had started to go wrong as soon as he joined the Barça first team.
It was August 2007.
Was 16 years old.
Paradoxes of life, at that time he had just signed his professional contract with Barça. And wasn't that, perhaps, the dream of any creature who aspired to make football his way of life?
Until then, Bojan Krkic had been the pearl of La Masia: he was the best player of his generation, a talent who scored goals and, by leaps and bounds, jumped up categories. When he was supposed to be a cadet, he played in the youth team. When he was supposed to be a youth player, he appeared in the reserve team and, in a flash, in the first team. Under Rijkaard's umbrella, the pearl had gone on to share the dressing room with Ronaldinho, Messi, Eto'o, Henry, Xavi, Iniesta, Valdés, Deco, Thuram, Pedro and Puyol.
Yes, a dream.
And from the outside, everything flowed.
But behind closed doors...
Beyond his immediate surroundings, no one was going to be aware of the crisis that, little by little, was going to grip Bojan Krkic, a child suffocated in a bubble of success, applause and money whose background, in reality, was more darker than we would have imagined.
(How many times has this reality been described to us!).
Grieved by a crisis of anxiety, vertigo and dizziness that had forced him to undergo treatment, Bojan Krkic kept his secret under lock and key and only now, half a year after closing his extensive football career, has he offered to reveal it to us.
He does so through Bojan, Beyond the Smile, the documentary produced by Rakuten TV, now available on the platform.
Did you suffer in the documentary?
No, on the contrary. No, no, I really enjoyed it.
And what was the creation like?
When I went to Japan (between 2021 and 2022 he played for Vissel Kobe) I knew the company NSN (Never Say Never) and with Joel (Borràs) we shared the idea. I was already in my last years as a player and I had the intention of externalizing my problems. He knew part of my story. When I told him more, he thought we should do it.
And why did he have his story saved?
There were many situations that I did not externalize and only managed internally. I did it with the intention of taking advantage of them and making myself stronger. Although that, in the world we are in, created confusion.
Why not externalize it?
Well, it's not that I didn't want to. The thing is, due to her age or the experiences she had at that time, she did not have the confidence to do it.
And how did he suffer it? He asked the commander of a plane, when he was on the take-off runway, to cancel the maneuver, as he could not fly to Great Britain.
I suppose that the accumulation of many situations that we are experiencing, that we accumulate but do not internalize, and that sometimes we do not give too much importance to, one day it will come out somewhere.
(At that time, Bojan Krkic was permanently leaving Barça to sign a new contract with British club Stoke City).
How was that episode?
I was on the plane and I felt sad because a few hours before I had signed the termination of my contract with Barça and I was leaving. I was going to another club for the first time, not on loan but as a signing. The fact of cutting the umbilical cord with Barça had enormous emotional significance. It wasn't just leaving Barça, it was leaving Barcelona.
And what happened?
All of this came together on the plane that was leaving Barcelona. Seeing myself on the takeoff runway, I was overwhelmed. I got up and went to the flight attendant and asked her to please stop the plane. She was surprised, at first she told me that she couldn't because the engines were already about to accelerate, but well, she must have seen that it really wasn't right, she quickly communicated it and they stopped.
And then?
I got off the plane and called my parents, they came to pick me up at the airport and we went home, I calmed down, we told Stoke what happened and the next day I traveled, now with my father.
Already in England, did you overcome it?
It was preseason and I found a group that made me feel comfortable. Muniesa was there, who had played for Barça, and my father also stayed with me in the first days.
In the documentary, the lack of adaptation in the Barça locker room is highlighted. It is said that you needed an umbrella.
He had entered the professional world when he was very young, at 16 years old. Nowadays we see that as normal, but at that time he was not. It was not normal for such a young kid to be gaining prominence in a club like Barça. I have always said that nothing happened that was not normal, what happened is that that child had to become familiar with the professional world.
But professional sport is a space, aggressive, surly, full of egos...
Let's see, it's a competitive world. I would define it as that, as is life. If you really want to earn your place, you have to earn it. And that implies a series of processes to overcome.
Henry played an important role. He helped you a lot.
He did it from day one. I think he identified with that 16 or 17 year old boy: he also started very young and has a big heart. This allowed him to get closer and give me a protective layer.
Once you left Barça, did you continue to see psychologists?
The support has been constant, in person or by video calls. It has been useful to me.
Do you follow it today?
Not now. For years, professionals gave me many tools to know myself and manage myself. Although I don't know everything, nor will I know.
Is being an elite athlete legitimate and advisable?
I've done it all my life and I would do it again. Compete, fulfill your dreams, discover new challenges, meet fantastic people through sport...
(Between 2007 and 2022, Bojan Krkic played for ten professional teams; he did so in Spain, Italy, the United Kingdom, Germany, Canada and Japan. Today he is a tutor for young talents at Barça.)
